Planning the Honeymoon

Planning your honeymoon started
several months prior to the wedding day, of
course. It started when you first began to
plan a budget for your wedding and decide just
how much you had to spend on this once-in-a-lifetime
event. So you should know well ahead of time
approximately how much you’ll have to spend on
this trip that will be the beginning of your life
together.
Even if you know you both have to be back at
work Monday morning and there’s only time for
a weekend away, you should plan now to make
that weekend a special one. Your honeymoon, just
like your wedding, is all about the two of you, your
personalities, and things you have in common.
It may be the first time you compromise on something
as big as a vacation. So many big changes in
such a short time! Surely you deserve some time to
relax and just enjoy each other, and that is what
the honeymoon is for. The honeymoon is a time
at the beginning of a marriage for learning about
each other, spending time together, and not being
interrupted by any outside concerns. By definition,
it should last a month. Realistically, you’re very
lucky if you get two weeks in a resort. Whatever
the amount of time, the intent remains the same—
to learn about each other, to spend time together,
and to indulge yourselves in such luxuries as
breakfast in bed. It may well be the last time you
are able to put so much effort into pleasing each
other without outside interruptions.
Talk about what this trip means to both of you.
Come to an agreement on where you’ll go and
what you’ll do, but remember: it’s a time for being
alone together. Don’t take your dog with you; leave
your children with their grandmother or a favorite
aunt; and limit the phone calls. This is meant to be
alone time, couple time. You’ll be caught up soon
enough in the busyness of life. Use the honeymoon
as it was intended, to make sure your marriage
gets off to a good start, a strong bonding
between the two of you.
If you both enjoy golf, a week at a golf resort
might be exactly right for you; just be sure to schedule
some time off the course as well.
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Courtesy Shutterstock © Kati Molin
This tranquil waterfall is a perfect place to
spend an afternoon alone.
Courtesy Shutterstock © David Huntley

 

If you are leaving the country, begin early to make
sure your passport is updated and you have any
required visas. If your destination requires inoculations
of any kind, make sure you take care of that
well before the wedding. Shots can make you sore,
leave you bruised, or cause other adverse reactions,
so you want to get them out of the way a few
weeks before the wedding.
Tell the hotel clerk, resort representative, or travel
agent that this is your honeymoon. They may
have special suggestions or offer a special room
at a special rate. Tell everyone you encounter that
it is your honeymoon. As the saying goes, everyone
loves lovers. Restaurant hosts may seat you at
waterside tables. Waiters may bring you a complementary
drink or dessert. Even flight attendants
get into the spirit and, if space is available and
you are not traveling with 20 other honeymooners
to a popular destination, they may bump you up to
first class for the trip. Of course, it is in bad taste
to expect preferential treatment, but it doesn’t
hurt to let people know

Why We Do That
Early in the history of English society, people
began their married life at a much younger
age; girls particularly were plucked from their
home to be wedded to wealthy merchants and
landowners. Not an eyebrow was raised when
a dashing young knight in his 20s, or even
30s, was married to a barely-in-her-teens girl
child or when two teenagers became husband
and wife. Of course, girls of that age were not
very well prepared for marriage despite the
best efforts of their older female relatives
who tried to educate them; in many cases,
the boy wasn’t either. But married they were,
and custom dictated that they begin reproducing
right away.
The time allowed for them both to be
“trained” in their new duties was one month,
or a moon, in the parlance of the day. It was
customary for the couple to spend this time
alone and to spend it partaking of a sweet
wine called mead. It was sweet because it
was made from honey. And so this period of
time, this month at the outset of a marriage,
become known as the honey moon. Basically,
the couple used that honey wine to get a buzz
that helped them overcome their shyness
about going to bed together for the first time.
Maybe this explains part of why we tell
youngsters about “the birds and the bees.”
At least it explains the bee part.